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Article about can single people be happy:
Here',s how to embrace healthy relationships and live the best life possible, according to experts. 5 Science-Backed Tips for Being Single and Happy—Even if You *Really* Want a Partner. Not sure how to be happy single?
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Here's how to embrace healthy relationships and live the best life possible, according to experts. Photo: Getty Images / Klaus Vedfelt. 5 Signs of a Toxic Relationship, Plus How to Leave One, According to Relationship Therapists. Three-Way Friendships Can Turn Toxic—Here’s How To Tell If You Should End Yours. Are You Falling Out of Love, or Has New Relationship Energy Just Faded? Our editors independently select these products. Making a purchase through our links may earn Well+Good a commission. It seems like everywhere you turn, there’s someone who’s happy in a relationship. Many of us feel inundated with romance novel recs on BookTok, frequent ads for the next rom-com blockbuster, and photos of couples living their best lives on Instagram. If all of that unrelatable romance has you feeling down, and you’re wondering how to be happy single, you’re not alone. Experts in This Article. Feeling beaten down by dating apps is totally understandable. After all, being single when you don’t want to be can be hard. You may feel lonely or not good enough. You might miss the unique types of intimacy—emotional and physical—that comes with a romantic relationship. You may be caught up in the thinking trap that romance is the one thing you need to be happy. You might feel societal pressure or the ticking of the “social clock” that says people are “supposed” to be married, have kids, and know the secret to being a fully functional, well-rounded adult by a certain (young) age. The pressure can be overwhelming and maybe even make you feel like achieving a happy life as a single person is impractical at best. All of those feelings and experiences are more than fair, however, and believe us when we say being single and happy is far from impossible. It sounds easier said than done, but there are many (often overlooked) benefits to being single and taking advantage of them may be exactly what you’ve been missing on your journey to self-fulfillment. Is it okay to be single? While TV shows and dating app ads might try to convince you otherwise, it is 110 percent okay to be single. In fact, being single is a pivotal part of life that helps us get in touch with who we really are. “It is not only okay, but absolutely necessary to be single,” says Dr. Morgan Anderson, a licensed clinical psychologist, attachment theory expert, relationship coach, and author of Love Magnet . “When we are single, we can do the work that we need to do on ourselves that makes us a magnet for healthy relationships. We can prioritize getting to know ourselves and doing our healing work so that when we do get into a relationship, it can be a healthy one that lasts.” (With that said, dare we suggest trying to stay single ?) Dr. Anderson adds that seasons of being single can give you time to build friendships as well as allow you to focus on your career, health, and other pieces of your life that also deserve attention. Additionally, singlehood (and working on yourself) can help you recover and build a solid relationship with yourself that will benefit you in the future. “It’s often healthy to be single, especially if you’ve just come out of a long-term relationship, if you have intimate relationship trauma or abuse that you need to recover from first, if you’re undergoing other major life transitions, or if you’re in a phase of life where you need to focus on your personal growth outside of a relationship,” says Natalie Moore, LMFT, a licensed marriage and family therapist based in Los Angeles who often works with millennials. Photo: Getty Images / MStudioImages. 5 tips for being happy while being single. Whether you’re wondering how to be happy single after a breakup, or just how to be single and happy period, therapists and research have you covered with the following advice for single people. 1. Focus on deepening other relationships. Moore points to an 85-year longitudinal study from Harvard that found quality relationships are the strongest predictor of happiness and life satisfaction. “This includes all types of relationships, including platonic relationships,” she clarifies. “With this in mind, if you want to be single and happy, focus on deepening the relationships that you already have, instead of focusing on the lack of romantic love in your life.” Not sure where to start? Queerplatonic relationships, supercharged friendships that are not necessarily LGBTQ+-centric, are a great place to start! 2. Do the things that bring you joy. When you’re single, you have even more time to enjoy your hobbies. That comes with extra benefits, too: According to a study in Psychosomatic Medicine , leisure activities are associated with higher psychosocial and physical measures for health and wellbeing. So, if there’s a new hobby you’ve been hoping to commit some time to, know that the joy you get from it is literally good for your health. Specifically, Dr. Anderson encourages finding activities that are energy-boosting and that add value to your life. “Not only is this a great way to be happy when single, but it’s also a great way to make friends,” she adds. 3. Engage in physical activity. Yep, movement isn’t only for your physical health. “Many studies support the connection between physical activity and happiness,” Moore says. She shares a 2020 study in the International Journal of Environmental Research and Public Health that suggests a strong association between the two across all age groups. She also points to a meta-analysis of 92 studies which found exercise is effective for mitigating depression and anxiety. So do some cozy cardio, take a silent walk—whichever exercise you enjoy (and can dedicate regular time to) is likely to have a positive impact on your well-being. 4. Practice “reality testing” Consider this: While common and understandable, the idea that “you’re destined to be alone forever” might be rooted in anxious thinking instead of truth. “When you’re single, it’s easy to compare yourself to others, to feel that timeline pressure, and to think things like, ‘Oh, I should be in a relationship by now,’ or ‘Why are all my friends married and I’m not?’” Dr. Anderson says. It’s easy to convince ourselves that this mindset is destined to become a reality, especially if we live in it long enough, but “these thoughts are based in fear, not in reality,” Dr. Anderson adds. That’s where reality testing can be helpful. Dr. Anderson explains reality testing as the process of examining your thoughts, looking for evidence for and against those thoughts, and replacing the thoughts with a truth more rooted in reality. Over time, this can help us be less reactive to negative thoughts as they pop up and not get so caught up in life’s “what ifs.” “Remind yourself that thoughts are not facts,” Dr. Anderson continues. “Get good at checking in with the reality of the situation.” 5. Try narrative therapy techniques. Narrative therapy techniques might not come to you as easily as picking up a new hobby, but they can be helpful in working toward your long-term happiness goals. This thought exercise requires you to write your perspective on the story of your life.
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