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Article about dating rules for teenage son
12 House Rules for Teens That Are Firm, Yet Flexible. Rules to help your teen enjoy their freedom while keeping them grounded, safe and respectful of your authority. by Nancy Reynolds November 28, 2022.
This Post: 12 House Rules for Teens That are Firm, Yet Flexible. Co-written by: Marybeth Bock & Nancy Reynolds. As a parent of teens, I’m sure it’s become painfully clear that raising teens comes with a fair amount of challenges. It’s a delicate balance of giving our kids enough freedom to experience life as an emerging young adult (and letting them figure out a few things on their own), all while we’re trying to protect them and help them avoid making monumental mistakes along the way. For my family, my saving grace was knowing my kids and I agreed to certain “house rules.” Not only did my “firm, yet flexible” rules offer my kids guidelines on what was okay and what wasn’t (along with the consequences when those rules were broken), it gave me tremendous peace of mind knowing that my kids and I were always on the same page. Let’s face it, teenagers are going through tremendous changes, physically and mentally, and sometimes, their brain (through no fault of their own) deceptively leads them down the wrong path. We need to map out a few firm, yet flexible rules and boundaries for them to follow – not only to teach and guide them but to protect them. While these rules don’t cover everything , they certainly made life for me and my teens easier, more peaceful, and far more predictable. Here are 12 house rules for teens that are firm, yet flexible. 12 House Rules for Teens That are Firm, Yet Flexible. 1. Respect is Not an Option. It starts out small… an occasional dismissal when we ask our teen to do something or a heavy sigh and a snarky comment, “ No Mom… I SAID I’d do it later !” Of course, we should always give our kids room to have a bad day (no one’s perfect), but we need to have high expectations of our teens when it comes to respect or, quite often, they will push the limit. Without mutual respect for one another (we have to show the same respect toward our teens) the entire family dynamic starts to crumble. It’s the foundation upon which everything else stands. From knocking before entering and not shouting or using foul language to asking before borrowing and learning the art of “agreeing to disagree,” your teen needs to understand that blatant disrespect won’t fly under your roof and that there will be consequences. (The more you expect respect from your teen, the more they’ll carry that respect over to other areas of their life, i.e. with teachers, coaches, bosses, etc.) 2. We’re a Family – Everyone Will Have Chores. It’s not simply about pitching in and working as a team in a family, which of course is important. It’s also about teaching our kids basic life skills, making them responsible, and making sure they understand that gender roles don’t apply. We need to teach our boys how to do the dishes, fold laundry, vacuum, and cook. And, teach our daughters how to mow the lawn, cut hedges and change a tire. That’s not to say we should implement this house rule with an iron fist. Most teens have extremely busy schedules. There will be times when our kids can help a lot and other times (like during finals) when they can’t help at all. Hold them accountable for some chores, but be flexible and respectful of the demands in their life. 3. Honesty Is Expected. If your teen walks in the door an hour past curfew, you need a straight answer. When they get in trouble with their friends, you need an honest explanation. Parenting is hard enough. When our kids start sneaking behind our backs, bending the truth, or flat-out lying, it becomes nearly impossible to effectively parent or protect our kids. In other words, you need to expect (even demand) the truth – no matter how hard it is for your teen to fess up. Heads up, parents: If you want your teen to be open and honest, you need to establish a safe foundation for them to do so. Avoid overreacting and scale back on harsh discipline (which has proven to backfire in many cases) and use your teen’s foul-ups and honesty as an opportunity to connect, forge a stronger bond and guide them. 4. School Is Their Job. Our teens may not go to work every day, but they DO have a job. School, homework, studying, focusing on their future – that’s their job. Make sure your teen knows that you expect their best effort. That doesn’t mean you expect all As. What it means is that slacking off, cutting school, blowing off homework, and choosing gaming on their computer over studying for a big history test the next day isn’t an option. 5. They Will Be Held Accountable for Their Actions. Now that our kids are getting older, we’re not doing them any favors if we rescue them when they screw up. They need to face the consequences of their actions head-on if they’re to become responsible adults. Sure, we’ll stand beside them and support them emotionally through it all (little do they know, we’ll always have their back), but they need to face the music solo. Fail a test? Blow off curfew? Break a rule at home or school? Get a speeding ticket? Heads up, teens, life is full of consequences. It’s better you start to learn that now rather than later. Remember: When implementing consequences at home, they should make sense and be relevant and fair. Over-the-top consequences that don’t align with the nature of your teen’s action is one of the fastest ways to lose your teen’s respect and trigger rebellion and/or resentment. 6. Safe Driving Rules Apply. Nothing can freak a mom or dad out more than when their teen takes to the wheel ALONE. It’s when the r eal worry kicks in. That’s why we need to have solid rules in place.
Dating rules for teenage son
Rules for dating my teenage son
